Once a couple becomes bitter, it is advised that they seek counseling. Bitterness over a long period of time can be repaired in
couples counseling when both parties are willing to do the work, including individual treatment to conquer their own demons.
Pamela uses a variety of relational techniques to help couples heal from their wounds. The primary technique used in sessions is
Imago Relationship Therapy:
Imago Therapy is a form of couples counseling designed to help relationship partners work out misunderstandings, reduce conflict,
and rediscover ways to bond, communicate, and generally find common ground. A primary goal of the Imago approach is to help partners
stop blaming, criticizing, and negatively reacting to each other and instead become more understanding and empathetic.
Developed in the 1980s, Imago therapy is based on the work of psychotherapist Harville Hendrix and his spouse Helen LaKelly Hunt
and derived from the theory that feelings you experienced in your childhood relationships are bound to resurface in your adult
relationships. (Psychology Today, 2023)
During sessions you can expect to learn to listen to your partner and summarize back to them what they expressed. You will learn
how to actively listen and reflect with empathetic awareness and validation of their feelings, instead of defending or blaming.
You will learn tools to help you in conflict, to come up with a plan of action, instead of continuing the defensive cycle of shaming,
blaming, criticizing or gaslighting (a psychological manipulation of creating self-doubt and confusion in your partner, instead of
taking responsibility for your own issues.)
Couples generally respond well to this type of therapy and will develop skills to use in the heated moments that take place in
every relationship. The primary request with couple's sessions is that everyone respect one another and not talk or scream over one
another's turn to express feelings.
Virtual sessions are often less scary than in person, and you will be asked to sign on from the same computer and to sit next to
one another. This will help Pamela discern body language and the intimacy or lack of during sessions.
Preparing for a couple's session is the first step to repairing your relationship.
